It's Official ... We are paper pregnant!!!

This week has been full of excitement around our house.  We received the official "text message" on Tuesday that our homestudy was approved and our names were being added to the list of waiting adoptive families.  I'll have to admit when I first got the text I had to read it twice and while I was excited and immediately called Nick I don't think it actually sunk in until I was on my way home from work ... I just couldn't stop crying tears of joy.  For you see while I have had the experience of reading the "positive" pregnancy test those joyous memories were soon erased by tears of sadness as both of my babies were called home to be with the Lord way too soon.  So this joyous news of "officially approved" was like getting to shout to the whole word I"M PREGNANT!!!! (just remember this pregnancy might be more than the usual 9 months)  The next few days were spent scrambling around getting the last remaining documents needed  - like signed picture releases and all and getting our profile books mailed to Bethany so they could be shown to birthparents.  As the reality of what all was really taken place was setting in God brought me to a very humbling place ... it was like He was telling me "my child you have persevered and withstood the test of patience ... Here is your reward!"   As I drove to the post office to mail the profile books to Bethany I stopped to lay my hands on the package to pray for all the birthparents who will read these books.  If you don't know the process; with our agency Nick and I have listed criteria for which we are looking for in a child and birthparent and the birthparent will list criteria for what they are looking for in potential parents for their child.  The agency then complies all the information and our profile book is then shown to birthparents who meet the combined criteria.  We are chosen to be parents based on a book!! Well that's not all exactly true ... we may or may not meet the parents but anyways that's the gist of how this works.  So you see these are books are pretty special; so on this very day I asked God to place His hand of guidance over these books and His hand of patience over my heart. 

Many of you will never fully understand the heartache that comes with years of infertility and while I would not have chosen this path for myself I am glad that God chose me for this journey.  Although it hasn't been easy, I wouldn't change a thing.  God has definitely made be a better, stronger person through this journey.  So here we start out on the second leg of this adoption journey ... the waiting one.  But never fear I have lots to keep me busy.  The nursery has to be painted, furniture to be bought, and bedding to be made.  So while I would love for my next post to be all about introducing you to Baby Fiveash, I hope you are all prepared to wait the journey with us and believe me there will be lots of pictures once this sweet baby arrives.

Love,
Phyllis